Are We Too Anxious About Parenting? Reflections from a Social Worker Sleep Consultant in Ontario

A while back, I read The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt. When I picked it up, I thought I knew exactly what it was going to say: smartphones are making kids anxious. As a former educator of 10 years, I thought, “Well, duh – obviously.” But the book surprised me.

Haidt doesn’t just talk about kids and their devices, he also points out how parents’ own phone use affects our ability to connect with our children. He highlights the decline of free, unstructured play, where kids run, climb, fall, and figure things out without adults stepping in at every turn. As I read, I found myself nodding, fist bumping, and even saying “Absolutely!” out loud. The lessons in this book stuck with me, and they show up in my work every day.

What Stood Out Then – and Still Does Today

Two things really hit home for me:

• Parents’ limited ability to see their child experience hard things.
  It’s not easy to watch our kids struggle. But struggle is normal, and with a loving, responsive caregiver nearby, it can be healthy. It builds resilience – and yes, this applies to sleep, too.
• Parents’ constant involvement in every part of their child’s play.
  As my own kids have grown, I’ve noticed how tempting it is to hover. But kids need independence. They need space to test boundaries and learn from peers – not just from parents.

And then there’s the one that stings a little: our reliance on online experts. Blogs, Instagram, TikTok – it’s endless. Add in our own phone notifications pulling us away from the present, and it becomes so much harder to trust ourselves and our kids.

The Link Between Anxiety and Sleep Expectations

In our consultations at Baby’s Best Sleep, half the work is reassurance. Parents often tell us, “My baby slept 11 hours, not 12. Is that a problem?” And the answer, almost always, is no. These anxieties aren’t rooted in science; they’re rooted in prescriptive “rules” that aren’t evidence-based. What matters most isn’t a perfect number on a chart – it’s the child in front of you.

Here’s what we encourage parents to look for instead:

• Does your child seem rested?
• Are they eating, pooping, peeing, and thriving?
• Do they feel like themselves?

If the answer is yes, then it’s okay to take a breath.

Why Work With a Registered Social Worker Sleep Consultant in Toronto

Our work isn’t just about naps and bedtime routines. As Registered Social Workers in Ontario, we bring training in child development, mental health, and family systems. That means when we support families, we’re looking at the whole picture – not just the sleep piece.

It also means our services may be covered under many extended health benefit plans in Ontario, since they fall under “Social Work.”

Work With Baby’s Best Sleep

At Baby’s Best Sleep, I work alongside an incredible team of Registered Social Worker Sleep Consultants who share the same philosophy: evidence-based care, compassion for parents, and practical strategies that actually work.

If you’re ready to tune out the online noise and get support that’s grounded in both science and empathy,  and often covered by insurance, book a consultation today. Together, we’ll help your family rest easier.